Today was an alright day for the Northwest. The sun was out, and happiness was flowing through my blood. I must say that these new meds my doctor has me on has me really energized, focused on my work, and is keeping the depression at bay. I often ask myself.. Why did I wait so long for this? Well it’s a process of elimination with anti-depressants and that’s been my life for the longest time.
I started seeing my therapist in 2013 and I then was referred to my psychiatrist later that year and while I was new to the bi-polar diagnosis I didn’t realize how many medications I would have to take in order to achieve results. Right now I take 200mg of Zoloft, Ambien, and Adderall XR for my ADHD. Overall I think it was the Zoloft increase and the added Adderall that gave me the much needed boost. I also sit in front of the happy light every morning at work for a good two hours or so. If the doctor ordered it then it’s in my best interest to follow their instructions! I really don’t want to be depressed ALL winter long. I know that depression will hit however I am determined to make this winter the BEST EVER! Hey Depression, if you’re listening.. Go fuck yourself. I’m better than YOU think I am.
I’ve realized today that I completely have forgotten how many days I’ve been sober.. Was it 3 months, or 4 months? I can’t even remember and personally that is FANTASTIC news! Whatever the number of days are my mind has never felt clearer and I am able to think fast on my feet. I should be celebrating my sobriety and although I am the inner demons continue to tell me what a loser I am and that I should drink my life away.. DEMONS be gone! YOU SHALL NOT WIN THIS BATTLE!
Overall, I’m 10 times better this week then I was last week. Every new day is a new adventure for me and I’m really loving this ride that I’m on.
It wasn’t until I stopped drinking that I realized my full potential.
Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.
Sleep well readers, I know I am! 🙂